This week I have just found that each day I had less and less energy. Today I could barely drag myself out of bed and even wondered if I was capable of getting into work (yesterday I managed to get on the wrong train and ended up having to quickly figure out a way to get to Guildford from the next stop – thankfully it was quite easy and I was only 10 minutes late). But I struggled through and made it in and it’s nearly the weekend.
After a chat with someone at work about all the things I’ve been trying to juggle – interests, schemes to make money, work, kids, flat…. I’ve decided that I really need to get back to basics.
I need to stop worrying about my weight and start focussing on my health. Eating healthy food, not drinking as much. Basically fuelling my body and doing the best I can to keep myself (and my brain) healthy.
I need to stop putting pressure on myself to do more in the evenings than I am currently capable of doing. If I need time to relax in the evenings then that is what I need to do. Not diarise other activities and then not do them and then feel guilty for it.
I have a tendency (due to the bipolar) of jumping headfirst into a new venture, and this week I have been tempted to try a meal replacement diet that a friend recommended me. But I haves nipped it in the bud, recognised it for what it is. A bad idea in my current state, and an expensive idea at that. I would end up even more tired and low and hungry. And a week or two later I would end up regretting it and giving up.
So here I go. Going back to basics. And the thing I need right now is sleep so I will probably eat early and head straight to bed.