Feel like I want to cry.
Don’t really know why.
Everything has been a struggle today. Everything. The kids, even doing the smallest amount of tidying. Making myself a cup of tea has been hard work.
I had a brief respite when Lala announced that I was playing hide and seek and they made me laugh by hiding in the most obvious place and giggling so loudly that I knew exactly where they were but obviously I had to loudly search all the most silly and least likely places (in cupboards, under the sink etc).
Ben is giving them a bath now and then putting them to bed and I’m just sitting on the sofa with a cup of tea. I have to put clothes away later and don’t know if I have the energy.
I don’t want to be getting depressed. I don’t want to have to be writing about this. I wish I could write about depression as wittily as this post which I read recently which really resounded with me. I think everything has just got too much for me.
I’ve rejoined Weight Watchers this week. I’m starting on Tuesday – going to meetings this time. I’m hoping that this time I’ll find the will power and inspiration to actually lose some of this weight and get back to feeling comfortable with my size again.