Eaten & drunk
– Muesli with goats milk
– Nuts & raisins
– stirfried veggies
– Apple – eat at 2pm*
– 2 oatcakes – at 2.30pm
– Banana – 3pm
– Nuts & raisins (2nd batch) 3.30pm
– 2 more oatcakes – 4pm
– plum thing / grapes – 4.30pm
– the last 2 oatcakes I can eat in car if needed
– didn’t feel like cooking so not really had dinner. Just had some carrot and houmous.
– 2 cups of earl grey tea
– 3 bottles of water (500ml)
*its nearly 2pm and I am determined not to eat all my snacks by the time I had yesterday (1.30pm so I’m doing better than yesterday already) so have decided to plan when I’m going to eat each thing to make them last.
11.10am. I felt much better this morning when I woke up. The headache had gone and, once I actually dragged my lazy bones out of bed, I felt quite bright. I got in the shower (thanking myself profusely for being bothered to make the heating and hot water go on an hour earlier) and had a lovely steamy shower and washed my hair. I normally do it in the evenings as I don’t bother blow drying it and usually I just put it up. But it really needed a wash. I was running a bit late but I wasn’t going to stress this morning as the traffic is not back to its usual hell-hole standards and there aren’t many people in to notice a few minutes lateness. So I took my time (as much as I could with the kids trying to help me with my makeup again) doing my makeup and my hair. I used red lipstick and am wearing my new work dress which is black at the bottom with a bar of orange and then red on the top with dark brown knee high boots. I feel good. I feel like I look good. It’s a nice feeling. I feel a little slimmer. I was worrying last night about the fact that I looked pregnant. In truth I was worrying that I may actually BE pregnant. My stomach just looked odd. Not just fat. But it did look less so this morning so I can only assume it was just bloated. Maybe a shock to the system eating all that healthy food and drinking so much water. Now, while in theory I love the idea of a third baby (in the realm of fantasy where I’m a natural earth mother with 3000 tonnes of patience and my husband earns like a million a year – ok not that much but enough to pay all the bills AND still keep us in holidays and gadgets), in reality, I’m starting to like my life that I have now. OK, its not perfect. I could be doing something more interesting (but my plan is to actually start training so that I CAN go on and do something more interesting). We have a good income between us. The kids are fab. I’m actually at the point where I can pretty much rely on the fact that I’ll get a reasonable amount of sleep – even if they wake up early or wake up in the middle of the night needing something they are usually easy to get back to sleep. Unless they are ill. But then illness throws out the best routines. Now I’ve actually found the willpower to do something about my eating habits, I can see in the future a slimmer me. A me that is happier in her body. The thought of giving all that up, giving up the money – I would have to give up work if a third baby came along as grandparents would DEFINITELY not look after 3 kids twice a week, and full time childcare for 3 kids is just prohibitively expensive. I would have to resign my body to being poked, prodded, used and abused, pulled and tweaked, sucked and scratched…. I’m not sure I could do that. I don’t know how my sister in law has gone through it 4 times. I actually now have a lot of empathy for her relating to raising 4 kids.
2.05pm. Just took a photo of myself in the loo mirror! You’ll have to excuse the work bathroom surroundings. Just wanted to share my dress. Also took pic of my boots.
Its nice to have nice clothes to choose from in the morning. I am thinking of making another small order off La Redoute for some vests and simple long sleeved tops (white and black to be worn under short sleeved dresses like this one). Came back to my desk, sat down, felt cold again so put jumper back on and got sharp pain in my head. Great. So headache is coming back. Its gone 2pm so Im going to have my apple.
2.51pm. I have gone through and labelled all my unlabelled blog posts. I know some people don’t bother but I like to be organised. I like being able to at a glance, see all the posts I’ve done about, say, depression, or my family, or about me (I know that technically it being my blog its all kind of about me – my thoughts if not my own activities). There really isn’t much to do. I’ve eaten my apple. Wasn’t as bad as I was expecting. I’ve eaten my 2 oatcakes. Am looking forward to my banana at 3pm! I’m also on my 3rd bottle of water. Which is one better than yesterday. Yesterday I drank 2 here and then took one to the car with me (I think) which I didn’t finish in the car. Only problem with drinking so much water is so many bloody trips to the loo!!!
3.24pm. I’m really looking forward to my nuts and raisins at 3.30pm. I’m glad I saved the best to last! lol. Only 6… no, 5 minutes to go.
10.30pm. I was going to go to bed early. But once kids were in bed it was nearly quarter to 8 and I decided to do half hour tidying. Did the spare bedroom – cleared all the wet clothes off the bed (no idea why my husband thinks dumping the wet clothes all over the spare bed is a good alternative to actually hanging them up… and if you don’t have time to hang them up just leave them in the basket. Now the bedcovers are all damp and it looked a frigging mess! Anyway, I digress). I cleared the clothes off the bed and hung them up. Then made up the bed (a friend slept in it and messed it up from last time I made it all nice). And started folding up and laying (neatly) on the bed all the clothes that are clean that were on the floor or dumped in baskets. I put away my stuff. Put all hubby’s stuff in one big pile – he can put them away himself – and left the kids stuff on the bed in neat piles – if we need anything before we have a chance to put them away in drawers at least its easy to find things. So at least I got one room relatively under control. I got myself into a bit of a grump because husband had gone out to the gym and left me to deal with paying the guy who had just turned up (hubby had forgotten about it) to sort out his car windshield. I also realised that the chickens were out whilst mopping the floor (it was just too disgusting to leave), which sent me into a bit of a rage to be honest. Why the bloody hell should he go out to the gym while I have to sort the house out and everything else. I texted him as much. To be fair he has sorted out quite a lot of other things today (not housework related, but some DIY, some phone calls and ordering things online) – he texted me back to tell me so. Anyway, we’re friends again now. I’m just tired. I’m lacking in all the sugary good (I mean bad) things that my body is used to.
10.51pm. Its late. I’m tired. My eyes hurt. I feel better than I did last night (no headache) but need a good night’s sleep. Friday tomorrow! Yay!!!
Ooooooh forgot to tell you. I’m getting a new laptop tomorrow. A macbook air. If you follow me on twitter you may know that I ordered a macbook pro a couple of months ago in a fit of shopaholicky depression but my husband made me cancel the order. Well, after lots of begging he finally agreed that I do in fact “need” a new laptop. I am getting the Macbook air because its small and light and really I don’t need all the fancy bells and whistles as all I want it for is surfing the internet and blog posting. I’d like to be able to do that stuff from bed, for instance. I’m so looking forward to it arriving. Its coming tomorrow. I am going to spend all weekend stroking it!!! I’m a bit nutty for gadgetry, can you tell?